Chronicles of a Seer: The Devil's Watcher
by Neamh
Summary: [U+M/incomplete] Tsukino Usagi just wants to turn eighteen. But fate's got another plan in the form of sailor senshi, past memories, and her personal favorite---Chiba Mamoru.
1. author's note

**chronicles of a seer: the devil's watcher**

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**disclaimer:** I do not claim any ownership to any of the following characters from these series: _Harry Potter, Sailor Moon, X1999, Inuyasha, and Fruits Baskets. _Don't sue me, 'cause I'm in college and don't have any money. You won't be getting anything from this girl.

**spoilers:** Volumes 8-9 for the _X1999_ magna, First Season of Sailor Moon, entire Inuyasha series, up to Book Four for _Harry Potter_, and up to Volume 4-5 of the _Fruits Basket _magna.

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**main parings:** Usagi + Mamoru (_SM_), Kotori + Kamui (_X_), Hermione + Harry (_HP_), Inuyasha + Kagome (_I_), and Tohru + Hatori (_FB_).

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**author's notes:**

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            Welcome to the first part of my massive _Sailor Moon_ trilogy. I'm very excited about this story, mainly because this has been in the back of my mind for quite some time now. I'm just going to give a minor introduction and get rid of some housing business now, but I will update the author's note chapter by chapter. 

            First off, there will be other animes in this story. _X1999_ will play a vital role in the story as well as _Harry Potter, Fruits Basket, and Inuyasha_. But the magic elements within the story will rely heavily on the storyline of _X_. 

            Secondly, this is a Usagi-centric story. She is the main character and I will use first person when it comes to writing her related parts. If you don't like her, don't read. It's as simple as that. Also, I'm uping the age in the story. Yes, it's based in the first season but Usagi is going to be seventeen. I'm going to rely heavily on the coming of age/eighteenth birthday thing.

            This is a Usa/Mamoru story. It might be a crossover in some odd sense, but it is a Usa/Mamoru story… I am a devote follower of the magna. The anime really did piss me off after the first season. It's going to be a whirlwind of a romance, trust me. Very dark and angsty as well.

            Feel free to e-mail me with questions and I'll try to think if I can add anything… Other than that, review please. Make me a happy author!

**chapter one:**

            Thank you for all the lovely reviews for chapter one. I do appreciate it and I'm glad you enjoy the story thus far. I just wanted to express this to you, my dear readers. I also wanted to say that the romance won't be starting for a bit, I have much to cover before it does anyways. Another thing is that most of Usagi's memories that she recognizes are pretty generic. The really important ones, for instance the identity of Kotori, are locked away in her subconscious. Usagi's actions only thrive on instinct, not things she can understand.

            Hope you enjoy the story thus far!


	2. decisions

i got my head but my head is **unraveling**
    
    can't keep **control** can't keep track of where it's traveling
    
    i got my heart but **my heart's no good**
    
    and you're **the only one **that's understood
    
    i come along but i **don't know** where you're taking me
    
    i shouldn't go but you're **wrenching** dragging **shaking** me
    
    turn off the sun **pull the stars from the sky**
    
    the more i give to you the more **i die**
    
                   **nine inch nails**
    
    **decisions**

            **W**e all have to make decisions sometimes. Inevitable ones, I suppose. For me, I don't know where to start and can tell you that maybe there is no place to start… no beginning and no end. I can't claim not to torture myself because I do. I do obsessively go over my thoughts time and time again with the same question _what have I done wrong_ playing like a broken record. But in retrospect, I do make decisions. Important ones. Decisions with altering circumstances. Decisions that make me start obsessing over the outcome. Like now.

            Once upon a time, in between leaving my family and entering a new one, I could justifiably declare a form of naivety. Put into perspective, a thirteen-fourteen year old girl and what she rather be thinking about… boys or who's about to try kill her next? I spent thirteen years of life in a family bred solely for the protection of the people of Japan and to instill balance between the spirit and the walking realms. That was the life that could have claim me and that essentially claimed the very life of my father and the sanity of my mother. Then came my year of limbo… What was I supposed to do? Think normal thirteen year old thoughts? About boys and friends and school? I've never had that opportunity. There was always much more important things to think about. But that year, I began to shut off those thirteen years as if they had never existed. A bad dream. Until a cat.

            Not many people can say that a cat screwed up their life. Then again, I can't really say that my life hadn't been one of those quasi-perfect lives because it hadn't been. But it was like having a chance at a moment to sit back and finally be able to breathe normally but that it disappeared once you touched it. Anyway, Luna the talking cat… no I'm not insane just yet. I can't really explain the concept of the double-edged destiny, but I have it unfortunately both as a guardian and a priestess and as a well… thus the embarrassment… a sailor senshi… I don't know what to tell you or how to describe my feelings on wearing a barely there mini-skirt. So we won't go there. Plus I'm trying to sit here and enjoy my chocolate milkshake. If anyone ever wants to end the world, chocolate is my weakness. Just thought I should put it out there.

            So yeah, sailor senshi. Femme-superhero with a talking cat. Oh and four other femme-superhero heroes.  Named after celestial bodies, mind you… moon, mercury, mars, jupiter, and venus. I just happened to be the elected-leader of the group, moon… the klutz. Alright, I'm not a klutz honest to god. I can walk on my own two feet, but I do have to maintain an image. It all goes back to the double-edged destiny. They can't find out about the past. It's too dangerous… for me and those who I care about… Although, I'm not happy with the stupid mini-skirt prospect. I'd go into this whole monologue, really I would, about being the fighter for _love and justice _who's looking for some mythological princess and how much I want to be a normal seventeen year old girl. But honestly, I'm not going to delve into my feelings because I really don't think about it. It's a routine to say the least and I planned to keep that way.

            Yeah, I said planned. God, what I wouldn't do for another chocolate milkshake… Anyway, the whole skirt business has become like routine much like the other things in my life. Get up, fight with younger brother, eat, run into Mamoru-baka, be bored at school, senshi business, senshi business, homework, senshi business, yell at Luna and baby-brat of a brother, more senshi business, and finally two to three hours of sleep. And the girls wonder why I'm tired…

            So I planned for this to be a routine. It would've been something to take my mind off the memories that I do carry of my real family and the people that I cared about that I left behind. As a sidebar, it was like trading four for four. Four of my best friend for four different friends, different circumstances with same situations. Anyway with this routine plan of mine, during the day I didn't have think about things and then progressively into the night I'd have to confront the memories. It all comes down to the eighteenth birthday, but that's a story for a different time, I suppose. Anyway it worked well, I guess… that's until another factor came into play.

            Chiba Mamoru, cynical bastard extraordinaire.

            Can't say I didn't like him in the beginning. He was and still is an ass, a pompous ass to be precise. He does get off on teasing me and half the time I want to hex him well into the next life for someone else to deal with. But then I did like him, the half-wit Adonis. He was intelligent, very few people can claim that they're intelligent mind you. His aura circulates a hidden kindness and trust. Despite how much of a prat and an ass he can be, he is trust-worthy. He's saved my life.

            Yes, I do know he's Tuxie with his dashing good looks and whatnot. It is obvious. Same aura, same voice, same annoying tendency to prove that chivalry still exists these days. Just put two and two together folks. Not that hard. Onto the other problem…

            "Odango-atama…"

            Speaking of the Devil's spawn. 

            I looked up, hand twirling the straw in my melting milkshake. "Problem?"

            He seemed taken at back with my tone of voice. If he came back in hour, I could pull off the ditzy-act if he wanted me to. I'm in a thinking mood, pondering the works of the universe… So sue me.

            He leaned forward, ebony bangs falling into his eyes. He reached up with one green-sleeved arm and pushed them away, only to have them fall into her face again. God, I hated that green jacket.

            "As a matter of fact, I do have a problem. You're in my booth."

            See, after the fact that I gave him a remote form of praise the idiot goes ahead and ruins it. Well, then if he wanted a verbal spar. I'd be more than happy too. It'll take some things off my mind.

            "One would think you'd have a thing for me, Odango," he drawled.

            "Really," I countered, eyes studying him for a moment. "Like I'd want to join the masses of big-breasted women falling at your feet. As for the booth reference, next time carve your damn name into it next time."

            Ass.

            He reached over and grabbed my milkshake. My goddamn milkshake… He lifted the straw up to his lips, eyes watching me with interest. Christ, invading my personal space and drinking my chocolate milkshake. You're lucky I'm in love with you, you ass. 

            "Good," he spoke off, licking his lips.

            Let me reiterate, a five-year old ass. 

            I'm done.

            Reaching over to grab my bag, I slammed down some change for the shake and got up to leave. Out of all days, I had to deal with him. Will the universe stop playing games with my life?

            "Where are you going, Odango?"

            I turned slightly, hand on the handle of the door. "Away," I answered slowly. "Away from you."

            So I left him there, empty chocolate milkshake and all. After all, he was the interruption in my routine of things. Sometimes he drove the nightmares away, sometimes he brought them on a platter for me. Chiba Mamoru had somehow wedged his way into my train of thoughts, whether I wanted him to or not. I could not control the affect the ass had on me. It was out of my hands, much with the idea that I was in love with him. I am in love with him.

            "Odango!"

            Shit.

            "Odango, wait up!"

            I stopped, waiting for him to catch up. I don't know why I took the abuse sometimes. It's a sick thought to think that I liked this attention he gave me. This kind of attention could put you in therapy for years. Then again, my life was grounds in general for a lifetime therapy session.

            "You okay?"

            I cocked an eyebrow. Concern? I'm touched.

            "Fine. You need something?"

            He studied me for a moment. I fidgeted. I hated when people gave me a stare-down. It was like being a mouse in a maze with all the scientists staring at you. That or the obnoxious seven year old poking you. He reached out and grasped my arm, his grip gentle but firm. Oh, like hell was I going to stick around and tell you the story of my life Mamoru-baka. I worry about me and you go back to obsessing over your goddamn princess who probably nothing more than a figment of your fucking imagination.

            "Want to talk about it?"

            Want me to tell you to fuck off? God, I hate getting angry. I get all foul-mouthed and everything. Although, I've been told it's very entertaining. Wonder what would happen if Sailor Moon were to develop a foul-mouth…

            "Odango?"

            "Is that the extent of your vocabulary, Satan's spawn? Odango, odango, odango… Blah, blah, blah-blah, blah… I just want to go home and get aspirin. Is that so wrong?"

            Come on, soak up my words and leave me the hell alone… He let go of my arm and gave a dejected sigh. Please, any other day I'd fall for it… not today though. He leaned forward, brushing a strand of hair out of my face. God, I'm looking at an hour of dreamless sleep tonight. The other two are going to be pretty occupied.

            "You know it might help to talk about. With one of your friends," he said softly.

            "Right-ooo. What are you my therapist? Just let me go home."

            He sighed and I took this as defeat and started walking away. No offense, but you worry about your problems and I mine. I can't afford to get people involved in any aspect.

            I tightened my hold on my book bag.

             Wonder if my mom's up for some pampering?

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            She hurt.

            Pain rain through out her entire body---her legs, her arms, her head… **what would it feel like to die right now**? She hurt. She didn't want to hurt… **break, break, break**… She heard murmurs, names even. Someone was calling her? Cries, mumbles---it hurt, everything. Nothing was clear, vision fading… **I will take the pain away, Kotori… let me help go in peace.**

_I don't want to die._

**but you must, for Kamui's sake and interest. remember the promise day.**

_I don't want to die. I cannot die, here._

**the promise day---destiny, 'tis your destiny.**

Her eyes shot open with her vision clearing. Her eyes were blue again.

            The ground shook.

            _It was never my destiny to begin with._

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            Ever get that feeling? You know the feeling when something terrible is going to happen? I can feel it, it has been bugging me all day. I'm snappy towards everyone, tired, and I'm actually brooding. Even my mother's pampering doesn't work.

            I walk towards the window in my room and sit down. Luna's sleeping on the ledge. The sun's setting. Usually there's a spectrum of all colors, but the sky's red. Red's an omen, a bad sign. I reached out, tracing the glass with an outstretched hand. **cold.**

            What's wrong with me? I can't stop thinking. Not even the small things, anymore… Sailor Moon doesn't matter. The princess doesn't matter. Me being in love with Mamoru doesn't matter. The past seems to be creeping up on me. I can feel its hand wrap around me, its claw digging into my---Luna?

            "The communicator had been ringing. There's a situation down near CLAMP…"

            But I didn't hear her. Luna didn't matter.

            _It wasn't even my destiny to begin with._

I went out the front door this time.

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	3. glass figurines

Wear the **grudge** like a crown of negativity.  
Calculate what we will or **will not tolerate**.  
**Desperate to control** all and everything.

Unable to forgive your **scarlet letter**men.

Clutch it like a **cornerstone**. Otherwise it all comes down.  
Justify denials and grip 'em to the **lonesome end**.  
Clutch it like a cornerstone. Otherwise it all **comes down**.

**Terrified **of being wrong. Ultimatum **prison **cell.

Saturn ascends, choose one or ten. Hang on or **be humbled again.**

**Tool**

**glass figurines**

_I used to wonder what life would be like if I wasn't always moving._ It's a constant cycle really. There are days when I'm deliriously happy, nights when I'm just ready to kill myself. There are times where I feel that things can somehow find a way to be fixed and then there are other where I'd wish to break. I can handle some days and then I can't handle other days. It's this whole never ending circle with these goddamn twists and turns thrown in for good measure. You can't escape either. 

Running isn't an option… which brings me to this point of mine… I don't know why I'm running. My damn lungs are about to burst. Okay well, wait that didn't make sense. I do know why I'm running--- there's some creepy youma down at CLAMP campus terrorizing innocent people and blah, blah, blah. That's always the first though in my head when the damn communicator rings. And then I usually jump out my window with Luna trailing. 

                See, but that's the thing… I took the stairs.

                I never take the stairs.

                I might play my part, but I never do things that are at this level of irrationality. Walking out my front door with my talking cat wasn't exactly a great moment, but hey I can't help it.

                _It hurts._

                I stopped, my heart pounding in my body. My head was throbbing so badly and I was ready keel over. Soft, but violent shivers assaulted my body. I could barely hear Luna at my side yelling something about transforming. I'm so tired all of the sudden. I'm about ready to fall on my knees. Everything burns.

                I took the stairs.

                I took the goddamn stairs.

                I was born to keep secrets. I was born to see things that no child should have to endure and bury them within the subconscious of my mind. I was born to keep things to myself, hence the obvious with the window and all. But I went down the fucking stairs. My mother saw me. I had never been like that in front of other people, close or not close. I've always maintained control. I took the damn stairs and my control flew out of the window… no pun intended. I just… well, I think… There are…

                There are these times where I have these feel---

                "Usagi-chan, what on earth are you *doing*?" 

                I growled despite my weariness. Damn cat. "What does it look like I'm doing? *My* nails?"

                "Usagi! Never mind that, girl. Transform!"

                "Luna," my voice grew quiet and dangerous. I knew what I had to do. The feeling that was tugging inside of me had nothing to do with any senshi-related. This was past. This were things that I couldn't afford to screw around with. It was time to rely on the instincts that I had locked away for so damn long. 

                I began to reach into the back of my mind.

                **_It was never my destiny to begin with._**

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**_                Not Kotori. Don't take Kotori._**

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**_                We'll always be best friends!_**

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**_                Just because a person leaves doesn't mean that they won't come back. This is my home. It will always be my home to me._**

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**_                I want to come back. I can't take this anymore._**

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**_                Mama, why me?_**

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**_                I'm not supposed to run away._**

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**_                It was never my destiny to begin with._**

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****I had no strength left in me. I fell to my knees and tried to ignore Luna's hysterical yelling in my ear. I sighed. She obviously didn't hear me. For a moment, I ignored her and searched for that dying feeling. My lips trembled slightly. I had to get to CLAMP, but my strength was falling. I'm confused. I'm being pulled in all different directions, I don't know what to do.

                "Odango?"

                Christ. Why me?

                I tried to pull myself up, but had no success at all. This whole situation was getting to be ironic. I had to get to CLAMP, but then there was a part of me that said it had nothing to do with senshi. I didn't understand any of these feelings. Thoughts of home, faces I haven't seen in years were screaming at me. I was vaguely aware of Luna hissing at Mamoru.

                "Luna," I warned. The cat got the message and backed off. But I could still sense her worrying over whatever was transpiring in CLAMP campus. I was just so confused…

                "Odango? Are you all right?"

                I looked up to be greeted by a pair of stormy blue eyes. Mamoru had such wonderful blue eyes, eyes that I could lose myself for hours in. I snapped my gaze away. Eyes I could not afford to lose myself in.

                Do I look all right?

                But instead I opted for a, "Could you help me stand?"

                He nodded and grabbed my hand.

                **_It was never my destiny to begin with._**

My knees gave through once more and Mamoru rushed to steady me. My heart began to pound furiously against my chest. Pictures and whispers soared through my mind. My eyes widened.

                "My god…"

                I finally began to put the pieces together.

                "KOTORI!"

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                **_"Mama, why do they have to go?"_**

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**_                Her mother chuckled. "You'll see them again, Kotori."_**

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**_                A four year-old Kotori looked up away from watching Fuuma and Kamui playing ball with wide eyes. Her mama was always so wise. "Promise?"_**

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**_                "I promise."_**

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                The first thing she did was scream, wrenching her arms out of her cross-like prison and falling to the ground. She was going to fight to stay alive. She was going to fight the only destiny she refused to part with, no matter how horrid the outcome. She would become a fighter. She would become a hunter. No matter the price.

                "Nice move, kid. But don't make this harder than it needs to be… although, amusement is always a plus."

                She looked up, Fuuma or now the body formally know as Fuuma, stood perched on her former prison. She frowned. She didn't want to hurt him… Her gaze wandered to a shock Kamui being helped by one of the Dragons of Heaven. He was bleeding so much… and she wanted to help him so desperately. But she needed to get out of here.

                "I don't want to hurt you," she spoke quietly. _Where did that come from?_ She trained her gaze onto her brother, a feeling of great understanding entering her mind. Her lips began to move as if she had no control over them whatsoever.

                _Chaldaei aquosus liberare draco maritimus_

                "Aw, too cute. Too bad."

                She watched as he adjusted the sword and came at her at inhuman speed.

                The ground shook.

                **_"Kotori come in now!"_**

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**_                "But mama, I love the rain!"_**

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**_                "You'll catch a cold! Please come in!"_**

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**_                She turned, her eyes filled with an old wisdom. For a moment, one could believe that the small child was an old soul with terrifying memories._**

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**_                "I am the water, mama. It'll never hurt me."_**

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Her eyes glassed over into a stormy blue and she raised one arm above her head, chanting all the same. _chaldaei aquosus liberare draco maritimus. _From the cracks in the ground, water whirled out and surrounded her in a spectacular spiral. _chaldaei aquosus liberare draco maritimus. _

_                **"Why are you crying, child?"**_

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**_                She sobbed, her small hands trembling as she motioned to clutch her chest. Her heart burned… And she was frightened… she made… she didn't understand…_**

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**_                "Kotori?"_**

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**_                "It scares me…"_**

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                The water began to take shape into form of a brilliant dragon, as blue as the ocean's waters and as legendary as the myths children are told. It stilled above her. Watching, waiting for just her one command. Vaguely she heard one of the seven whisper:

                "What are you?"

                She brought her hand down.

                **_It was never my destiny to begin with._**

                The dragon roared.

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                **_There were five figurines._**

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**_                The first was for hope. A small girl with her eyes wide as a doe and as green as Spring's grass. A small girl dressed in soft colors with a blue ribbon to keep her night-colored hair tied back from the dancing wind._**

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**_                There were five figurines._**

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**_                The second was for love. A young girl dressed in nothing but rose-kissed pink and clutching a bouquet of baby roses, gazing into an endless blue abbess. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were bright with a variety of emotions. Her long blonde hair looked like weaves of gold._**

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**_                There were five figurines._**

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**_                The third was for passion. A wild little nymph with eyes the color of amber flames and long coffee-colored curls loose against her back with her lips curved into a slight smirk. She sat on the edge of a rock with a crown of violets on entwined in her head and her emerald gown hiked up to her knees. A hawk sat perched upon her shoulder._**

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**_                There were five figurines._**

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**_                The fourth was for kindness. A gentle soul with eyes the color of the sky and chocolate-colored locks that were braided and threaded with red ribbons. She held a basket of flowers in one hand and in the other a small chain of sliver. Her expression was that of happiness._**

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**_                There were five figurines._**

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**_                The fifth was for life. A young one filled with everything possible… from happiness to sadness, to loss and forgiveness. Her hair was the colored of moonlight, windswept and array. Her eyes were a dark blue, the color of the sea._**

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**_                There were five figurines._**

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**_                Each made of glass that could break._**

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**_                There were five figurines._**

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**_                In shards of glass._**

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